What is a Nesting Co-Parenting Arrangement?
Living Arrangements and Parenting During a Divorce
During a divorce, living arrangements and parenting time agreements are dependent on so many different factors and there is no “one size fits all” option that works for each family.
Perhaps you have small children who require stability. Maybe neither you or your spouse can afford or desire to live completely away from the family home. “Nesting” is something to consider when you’re going through a divorce and researching different ways you and your spouse can co-parent until the process is over.
What is Nesting?
Nesting is where two people going through divorce take turns staying in the family home. As the name implies, the house acts as a “nest”, where the children can stay put and not have to move between parents while the divorce is being finalized. The children can have access to their room, clothes, items, and overall stay in a familiar environment. On the other hand, it’s the parents who would do the moving around. In a way, parents take on the emotional burden of moving place to place instead of the children.
Is this something you could do? Couples who consider nesting describe themselves as very cooperative, they want to put the kids first, and believe nesting will help them both financially.
On the Reddit divorce subreddit, some users talk about their experience with nesting. One user shares “It involves a lot of sacrifice and willingness to put our differences aside for the kids. But the kids have had a very smooth transition – they haven’t missed a beat at school and while they get sad sometimes, I see the positive effects of keeping them in one place.”
Other users share the problems they foresee with nesting. It’s the belief of some that leaving the marital residence before a temporary custody order is in place is potentially a big mistake. These people often feel that an enormous amount of cooperation is needed to make nesting work which is hard to maintain with someone you’re divorcing.
The pros and cons of pursuing a nesting co-parenting strategy must be throughly weighed. Boundaries and rules must be discussed and honored too. Things to think about include:
- What if either spouse begins dating?
- How will shared responsibilities in the house be delegated?
- How is nesting going to impact the healing process of divorce?
- Will the house eventually need to be sold?
- How will bills be paid?
Divorce Consultations in Oakland, Macomb, and Livingston County
Our attorneys are available for free consultations for those in the Macomb, Oakland, and Livingston county areas of Michigan. If you need guidance from top family law attorneys, we would be happy to help you understand your rights and the next steps in divorce cases. Our offices are in Rochester and Brighton if you prefer an in-person consultation, but we can do over the phone at your convenience.